"Therapists rape your mind." - Johny said to me before my first session. Knowing I have a more-than-average (and truthfully, irrational) fear of getting raped, he still said this. What a friend...
Anywho, it turns out I'm pretty okay. I convinced the therapist I didn't need medication because yoga makes me happy. She agreed I didn't need to take meds, so that made me happy. The first couple of times, I felt like I was crazier than I thought. Now, I don't think I'm as crazy, or... I'm just the appropriate amount of crazy. It's manageable craziness.
We talked about my parents. It's amazing how much our parents really shape us. It makes me absolutely terrified to have children. Although, I am thankful for my parents. I think the things I've realized through therapy will help our family be healthy. I sure hope so. It's freeing because I feel less burdened, yet it's scary because it's new territory. Hmm, I don't think I make any sense. You can ask me about it if you want and I'll try to do a better job of explaining.
My therapist says I need to go with my "gut feeling". What is that? I think I'm missing a link somewhere. She says I probably learned to not discern/acknowledge my feelings as a coping mechanism. I still don't fully understand that either. I'll have to let that one marinate.
Overall, I think therapy was a good thing. It's made me a little more aware and hopefully, I can work through issues and grow.
'08 will indeed be great.
3 comments:
Greatness is in action not in though.
thought*
You know, sometimes I think the entire point of seeing a therapist is just so people are able to say "My therapist tells me..._____"
It is an interesting conversation starter after all.
But it's good you've found it's workin' out for ya.
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