My friend

Me: You've called me a dork like 5 times in this short conversation. Thanks friend
Dan: No problem, Dork.

I thought it was interesting that he capitalized the 'D' in dork. Not only am I dork, I'm a capital-D dork. Hmmm.

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Take a moment to stop.
and look around to notice the trees and sky. The sky has been amazingly captivating these days.

So I was thinking . . .

It irks me when people consider injustice and poverty as subordinate issues or issues that only liberals care about. Contrary to people's assumptions, I truly would not consider myself uber liberal (well, maybe when it comes to the environment). However, certain people seem to assume that I'm a liberal - contaminated by the media and socialist propaganda - because I fervently oppose injustice and become saddened by poverty. So be it. Honestly, I probably do lean a little more to the left.

Why/how did such issues get polluted and politicized by society? It is perfectly reasonable and humane to feel empathy for those who are ostracized, oppressed, raped, abused. It is absolutely illogical and barbaric to ignore or feel nothing when seeing or hearing of such atrocities happening to our brothers and sisters of the human race.

Benevolence is growing extinct. Humanity is a dying race.

How can we not care? The state of humanity ought to be the concern of all people simply because we are all human.

Excites Me

This song excites me:

Fast as you can

I let the beast in too soon, I don't know how to live
Without my hand on his throat; I fight him always and still
Oh darling, it's so sweet, you think you know how crazy
How crazy I am
You say you don't spook easy, you won't go, but I know
And I pray that you will
Fast as you can, baby runfree yourself of me
Fast as you can
I may be soft in your palm but I'll soon grow
Hungry for a fight, and I will not let you win
My pretty mouth will frame the phrases that will
Disprove your faith in man
So if you catch me trying to find my way into your
Heart from under your skin
Fast as you can, baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can
Fast as you can, baby scratch me out, free yourself
Fast as you can
Sometimes my mind don't shake and shift
But most of the time, it does
And I get to the place where I'm begging for a lift
Or I'll drown in the wonders and the was
And I'll be your girl, if you say it's a gift
And you give me some more of your drugs
Yeah, I'll be your pet, if you just tell me it's a gift
'Cause I'm tired of whys, choking on whys,
Just need a little because, because
I let the beast in and then;
I even tried forgiving him, but it's too soon
So I'll fight again, again, again, again, again.
And for a little while more, I'll soar the
Uneven wind, complain and blame
The sterile land
But if you're getting any bright ideas, quiet dear
I'm blooming within
Fast as you can, baby wait watch me, I'll be out
Fast as I can, maybe late but at least about
Fast as you can leave me, let this thing
Run its route
Fast as you can

A Charlie Brown Life

Charlie Brown keeps repeating "Happy Valentine's Day, Happy Valentine's Day, Happy Valentine's Day..." to say to the little-red-haired-girl, his crush. He finally gathers enough courage, walks up to her and says, "Merry Christmas."

My mama cracks up when she thinks about that one. She enjoys the Peanuts comic strip. She's been mentioning Charlie Brown more frequently these days. She says that everyone has a little Charlie Brown in them and we all don't succeed at times. Mama says it's all about the little victories and learning to laugh amidst the seemingly failures. It amazes me how she doesn't really seem to see anything as a failure. She patiently waits and hopes and waits again.

"Be loving to him. Because he's only a little boat looking for a harbor."

She loves Charlie Brown.

A Twist

it's all so awkwardly comfortable and pleasant

Bitter Bug Bit

but the warm hug made me smile. thanks. :)

Wow.. two nights in a row. I'm a blessed girl.

"Everything was unchanged..."

"I hope you want nothing? You'll get nothing." That Miss Havisham.

I'm reading Great Expectations right now. Dickens frustrates me at times because I find him excessively wordy at times, but I must admit that he's an impressive storyteller.

My question to you: Why does Pip love Estella and not Biddy? What is it about Estealla's beauty, coldness and cruelty that attracts Pip? I like Biddy.

Everything Changed

I booked my flight to Minnesota for Megs' wedding. I leave the 10th of January and return on the 15th. I hope it's not too cold. Megs asked me to read a bible verse/passage at her wedding. I'm a bit nervous; I don't think I'm very good at reading under pressure in front of people.

I think it's going to rain today. This makes me smile. This week was such a blur and I'm not sure whether it was good or bad; it just was. I thought about expectations this week. I have realized that the less I expect anything of people, the more I will be pleasantly surprised. The only problem is that deep down inside, I can't help but expect a little. What do I expect? I don't quite know; I don't know it until I don't get what I expect. I get over the initial sadness and hint of disappointment, but I still don't like it. Therefore, to rid myself of such unpleasant feelings, I will try to no longer expect. It's quite liberating. My only aim: love people. Reciprocity is dead to me now; it's ridiculous to expect and I don't want to be ridiculous. I simply want to love, love, love (and listen to Air's Alone in Kyoto all day long. The song mesmerizes me and I can imagine so many different scenarios that seem to suit the mystery of the song. It's the soundtrack for my daydreaming).

Magic drifted through the air
touching everybody there
You came into my life so small
altering everything changed